It’s come time for some reckoning I think – since I have been only sporadically posting on this blog for the past year or two – and in the last year I think I’ve been averaging about two posts per month. In the land of daily diarizing, this isn’t even worth a mention – though I recognize that I have some regular readers who do prop or like my posts whenever I do get around to dropping by, and that is always noticed!
When I started blogging twelve years ago, I wanted a place where I could write every day, where I could connect with other folks, and where I could keep a record of my life as it went by – and that is how I used it for the first several years – to practice my writing, to keep track of things and share them with others….. but lately? It just seems that I come here to post nifty things I am making or random photographs, but I don’t get much into the rest of life at all.
And so I’ve been thinking – what do I want from this space? If all I want is a place to show off my stuff, there are now (unlike twelve years ago) a hundred different craft social media sites I could do that on. If all I want is a place for random photos and quips – Facebook is just fine for that purpose. But still, I am loathe to give up on the blog – because it represents something I still want to do… which is to write, and to share more in-depth about the contours of my life, especially as I enter middle age.
I started here at thirty, and as my posts attest, it has been a twisty-turning decade and a bit – I am definitely a happier and more grounded person than when I started out here, and yet I still constantly seek validation and support. Some of my struggles are the same (weight, fitness), while some of them have changed significantly (housing, partnership). I do still love to cook and make things, take photos of those things, and share what I’ve learned. And now, at the end of four years of graduate school I’m going to start reading on my own again – which I am sure will bring me back to the book reviews I used to post here fairly often. So it seems there is much to keep talking about, if only I give myself the time to do it. That means less random Internet surfing and more thinking about what I am going to write next.
So this is my intention – to post here daily for the next month and see whether the blogging takes again or not. I expect it will, since mostly these things are just habit, but I may get to the end of April and decide it’s just too much work after all. I know that I appreciate the blogs that I read, and I like to be a part of that sharing circle, so I’m going get myself inspired by all of you while reinvigorating my own writing practice.
Spring Equinox seems like and appropriate time for renewal, does it not?
I ordered these patterns as a birthday gift to myself and they arrived last night. Apparently the fabric I ordered to go along with them is on its way today (UPS). Guess I better get my current sewing project on the go so I can get these into my wardrobe. Feeling a serious need for some new spring frocks given the turn of weather here over the last few weeks (I know, I shouldn’t fall for the false spring but it’s impossible not to – I so much want to believe that the rains are over.
My plan for the weekend is gardening because the weather looks to be fine for it – mostly I need to clean up the garden I left in disarray last fall – but I also might try and sneak some arugula, corn salad, radish and spinach seeds in there – or at least the first two, leaving the last off until next weekend when we are actually into March. Really, the emphasis is on the clean-up because things are a mess. Anyhow, it may not be spring yet, but I’m getting myself all ready for it just the same.
I have to admit that the coming of spring weather has renewed my cabin obsession; after months of not being able to go up there (since October, because it’s not winterized yet) I find myself thinking about our place outside of Princeton non-stop. Brian and I plan to go in two weeks time for an overnight to take some things up and assess where we are at for clean-up of the site, and then spend the Easter long weekend there doing work, whatever work we can do pre-insulation and pre-framing-inspection. There are still a lot of steps between here and finished and it’s hard for me to discern the order at times. In any case, I’ve spent at least part of the day googling cabin interiors with an emphasis on planks and reclaimed wood. We are not going to get to interior finishing this summer, though I am hopeful that all exterior siding, rails and interior insulating will be done. (We just heard back from our woodstove guy also and he says if the snow melt up there continues he will be able to get our woodstove in by the time we visit in two weeks. I hope that’s so or otherwise it’s going to be a bit cold.)
This spring I am also planning on putting a wash station together for the outhouse, install a rain barrel installed on that structure, plant some shrubbery around the base, and build a small meditation shelter at the top of our property. Now that I write all that out, I’m getting mitre saw angst – mine is such a beastly, ancient thing (vintage 1970s, my dad gave it to me and it’s a workhorse but so damned heavy – yes I know everything was made so much better without plastic but it’s also impossible to move my mitre saw around without developing a hernia – I seem to remember that the same was true for the Husqavarna sewing machine that was passed down by my mother).
Anyhow, I’ve started a cabin design and decorating Pinterest board which I hope will at least channel my little obsession until I get up there and start doing some work again.
Two weekends ago I turned forty-two and recorded the better part of an album in two days on the Sunshine Coast. I then took all of last week off work. Since then I have finished sewing a blouse, finished crocheting a sweater, cleaned my house, went to Vancouver island for two nights, lead a meditation class, had a long visit with my mom, attended a dharma talk and ritual commemorating the Buddha’s life, and attended a concert at the Chan Centre. After all that, I have to admit that I had a really hard time caring at work today.
Someone left a frog on the edge of our front yard pond and for a moment this morning, my partner thought it was a real frog. Hooray! Isn’t that a little bit of fun 🙂 The pond is very small, but it is a fascination to the little kids on walks with their moms – probably it’s the turtle fountain that shoots water – but it could just be that our yard feels cozy and inviting. I want to do a lot more planting in it come this spring – plus add some more little features. The front yard has been a long work in progress – I sometimes wish I had a few thousand dollars to throw at it and just get it done – but instead I pick away at it a bit year by year. I see that one of the houses on our block is slated to be torn down and I’ve got a mind to knock on the door and ask if I can dig up the plants in the front yard to fill mine with.