Red Cedar

okay – i’m having a super lame moment which i need to share with the world….

i was invited to fly to mexico with a close friend a couple of days ago – to which i initially responded “no” for a few reasons involving commitments to other people, and giving short notice at work (which i don’t like to do).

yesterday, he caught me online and proceeded to barrage me with reasons i should come (other good people coming along for the trip, kayaking in warm waters, vacation, sun, sand, mexico is good etc. etc.), – and so, i wavered. this is someone i enjoy spending time with a great deal, an old friend – which made it even more attractive – and slowly through last night and early this morning i managed to convince myself that not only could i ditch my original commitments – but i could stand the *long* flight in a very *small* (4-seat) plane.

but here’s the hitch – i thought long would be 1 very long day – but it turns out (from conversation this morning) that the ride to the southern baja tip would be 2 very long days. 2 very long days in a very small plane.

huh.

did i ever tell you the tale of my great uncle who went missing over wells grey park? never found him or his float plane. true story.

anyhow – it wasn’t so much fear of accident as fear of discomfort that won out the day here – being that i’ve never flown with this friend before and have rarely been in small aircraft (except on occassion with said missing uncle) – what if it was 2 days of abject misery, nausea and stress? defeats the purpose of the vacation really….

so there it is – i’m not going to mexico, and i’m officially not nearly as cool as i thought i was for a moment there.

*sigh*

(but i am going to vancouver island this weekend where i will see good friends and go camping and hang out – which i was originally really looking forward too – must re-orient…. )

a friend of mine asked me this weekend how nanowrimo was going for me – to which i had to confess that after about 8000 words, i quit – mostly because my main character bored me to no end and also because i have too many other things going on at the moment to focus on something so dedicated as a novel draft. i would like to make an attempt at the 30-day novel again in the not-to-far future, but really i need to be more realistic about setting aside time in my life and not heaping on other things at the same time (like learning how to quilt).

but as far as it goes, i have been writing a tremendous amount anyways – work stuff, letters, bits and pieces of thoughts. at the moment, i have two different personal essays that are lurking in note-form – one of which i might actually be able to publish if i can get it down into some coherent and mildly amusing sketch. i also found some writing exercises online today that have reinspired me to try my hand at poetry again.

unfortunately, this much inspiration generally turns into a fidget rather than anything constructive. i choke, worried i won’t get through it – or i start hating it somewhere in the editing process. which is one of the reasons i prefer blogging: not having to produce anything really finished – my metaphors may remain mixed, my theories half-formed…. which is a lot the way i live my life really.

anyhow – i am supposed to be working from home today but i think i will take my notebook and go for a walk into town. i’m a bit stir-crazy at the moment, and i’d rather be hammering out this workplan i’ve got due in a cafe somewhere rather than my house.

hey-o

over the past couple of weeks, i have received several emails from people complimenting this blog in some fashion or other – many from friends, and a few from people i have never met in real time. i just wanted to say (cause i’ve been bad about responding to email lately) – that it really means a lot to me that people read and enjoy my writing and photos here – and thanks for saying such lovely things about my blog-writing. i really really do appreciate it greatly when people respond to my writing either via email or blog-comments.

so thanks – tons – i mean it 🙂