Red Cedar
More apocalypse, less angst
Post #2042: What I did on my summer vacation
Post #2041: Post-storm waking
We arrived at the cabin yesterday evening amid a thunderstorm and heavy rain event that went on throughout the night – the first rain the area has seen in a month, but at 15 mm an hour. This after driving right through the eye of another storm on our way through Manning Park – we were so close to the lightning that we could smell it in the air.
It’s cool here this morning, but I type this post from the coziness of the camp bed pictured above, the quilt that took me ten years to make is finally in use – and the extra loft batting is providing enough warmth – though if I was to get up right now I would have to make a fire in the woodstove.
Post #2040: Into the cloud?
I am writing this blog post from the middle device you see in the picture above – my new Chome Book flip – a 10-inch mini-laptop that also doubles as a tablet. It’s a bit of an experiment in two things for me really
- Will I use a tablet and,
- Am I willing to move entirely into the cloud for my next laptop purchase a year or two down the road.
I have always been a diehard Apple user – and my last four computers have been some variety of Apple laptop. I am currently running a 15-inch MacAir which I love for it’s light weight and metal case. It’s both durable and portable and I’ve been running it for the last two years with no problems (and I expect it to last me quite awhile longer).
But over the same period of time I’ve started to put more and more of my material into cloud services for easy access. I no longer use native apps on my laptop, and have pretty much exclusively moved to Google Drive apps for creating documents and storing files. While I wouldn’t put anything sensitive into the cloud – most of what I do doesn’t fall into that category – web coding, paper writing, random bits of research of interest to no one but me. This habit means that no matter whether I am at work, on my phone, on the road in an airport, or anywhere else – using any device – I can always access the stuff I am currently working on. It also means that I am always 100% backed up without any effort on my part.
It is this tendency that has lead me to question whether I need the traditional laptop anymore at all – or whether Internet connectivity has finally reached the ubiquitous state in my life, that I can rely it entirely for access to my documents. So the mini Chrome Book was inexpensive (less than $300 Cdn) and gives me the ability to test that theory. It also gives me a portable e-reader and all-round device that is larger than my phone, but smaller than my laptop (which I rarely carry around due to its size). This Asus Chrome Book flip has the same metal case that I love on my Mac Air, and has a durable feel to it – meaning I’m not afraid to throw it in my purse without an extra case around it.
For storage purposes (the device comes with 16 G built in) I will purchase a mini-SD card that will allow a larger download of music and some file storage for when my connectivity isn’t great or I don’t feel like using my data plan hotspot off my phone.
So I am playing this morning, by writing this on the bus as I head into work – and then publishing it via my phone/data connection in a truly mobile fashion.
I definitely have some kinks to work out still – like photo storage options – but so far, so good. I plan to take only this device with me to the cabin this week and test its full range rather than relying on my laptop at all.
Post #2039: Containing multitudes
Walk-jogged to work in augmented reality, am now in my self-contained work pod plugged into bluegrass fusion, simultaneously coding and ordering a book on the life of John Cage and Zen from the library, tracking a package with my new flip chrome book as it heads towards my house. I live in the future of my childhood, no doubt about that.
Post #2038: The big lessons in life…..
I feel like I’m ready to give up on people in general. Not the people I love, not the people who support me and love me back for my intrinsic self. But I’m feeling exhausted by pretty much everyone else – and I have at least a couple of relationships in which I’ve started to feel pretty much used. I have to check this feeling because I have some social anxiety issues that pop up every once and awhile which can cause me to interpret things in unintended ways – but after months of a certain kind of treatment, I’m pretty sure I’ve detected a pattern that leaves me pretty sad and unable to keep reaching out with invitations to certain folks.
Fortunately, loss is something that comes up frequently in my meditation practice – something that comes up frequently in dharma teachings really, but my own losses are sharp sticks which I bump up against often and I’m working with them. Not exactly letting go, but living with – and I find that accepting my past deep losses more fully, instead of wishing they weren’t mine or had never happened, allows me to more quickly recognize and step away from the pain of the smaller slings and arrows that are a part of daily relations. Not only that, but the gratitude for those who have been with me on my life path for many years, my oldest friends and my current partner, grows each time I see clearly the relationships which are not characterized by a mutual trust and respect.
I don’t feel the need to be dramatic, to sever ties with words or actions which I cannot take back, I am comfortable with the unfolding of things as they are. But it does help to realize when actions are fruitless so one doesn’t waste their energy in pursuit.
The photograph above was taken this morning on my way into work – I’ve never noticed the words on this hoarding before – but they seem appropriate to how I’m feeling right now. I’m not too afraid to let go of what isn’t working for me, not scared enough to accept poor treatment in ways that I used to just let it go. It’s these words that I’m sitting with today.
Red Cedar 