Post #3292: Seeds and stuff

Here we are, right on the vernal equinox – and just like that the neighbourhood is full of bird and frog songs. The serenades started a couple of weeks ago, baby birds first, the frogs joining in about a week later. Such welcome sounds after late snowfall this winter. This morning there is rain, but also the strong scent of ocean in the air, the gulls were squawking well before dawn making me wonder if there is something dead on the beach they were excited about.

I’ve been pruning trees and moving plants around in the garden a bit as I start to orient myself outside again. The rhubarb was not thriving in the spot I planted it three years ago, so I’ve moved it into the orchard which left a patch of acidic soil open to move the struggling blueberries into. I’ve got some dye seeds in the planting tray, and flower seeds to sow outdoors (hollyhocks and sweet peas – both of which I need more of in my life). It’s really just puttering at this point, but pretty soon we’ll have to get serious about the yard again.

I’ve been a bit mentally absent from things these last three weeks, owing to an epic issue going on in another part of my life (not health-related, I’m fine – just stressed). Because my life normally hums along in a drama-free way, and I do lots of meditation and exercise to help keep things stable, I had forgotten how much acute stress acts to separate the self from the body (the chemical flooding, racing heartbeat, and dissociative states). It’s made it impossible to write anything other than my handful of daily instagram words, and I haven’t been very good at keeping up with anything not immediately in front of me.

As a result, some issues I thought were long resolved have returned. Fortunately I know that can be helped with a bit of therapy, so I’m figuring that out right now as well as doing what I can to alleviate the actual situation that created this chain effect in the first place. It’s been a trying time, all round, though I recognize how well-resourced I am, including having a very supportive life partner who pulls out all the stops in our life together.

I’ve got a new warp on the loom as of last night – napkins with squares of texture which you can see in the photo above. I’m not sure about my colour choices after the soothing blues I was working with last month, but I think when these are finished they will work and I do love the combinations coming out in the weave. Working with my hands is one of the things that calms me most, the project-oriented nature of functional work brings me immense satisfaction, whether that’s weaving a domestic item or winding a ball of yarn.

I’m not sure how to close this off except to say I’m still out here, doing my thing, and working through the stuff that needs to be worked through. More soon when the writing returns to me – and happy equinox to all! May your days unfold with grace as the season transitions to warmer days!