Red Cedar

this is one of my favourite pictures from the trip to bella coola, my friend megan looking up at a giant and ancient cedar tree

i don’t have much to say today. the 2nd level grievance hearing yesterday went fine, and today i have mostly been in meetings or answering email all day (recreational fishing season always brings a host of new questions from people to answer).

really i am just posting so i can share with you my favourite picture from my recent trip to bella coola.

this tree (and about another 25 like it) is in an ancient cedar grove just outside of the town of bella coola. it’s remarkable these weren’t cut down when the valley was logged. we speculated on why that might have been since these are by far the oldest trees around and accessible…. this area is mixed cedar, spruce and cottonwood and other than a spot in the gifford pinchot, i don’t think i’ve ever seen this many trees of this size in one location…. it’s a really beautiful spot.

at the edge of burnt bridge creek, i shot this looking up towards mount stupendous with my new telephoto lens

once i’ve been away, i find it difficult to start blogging again. routine broken, coming back to regular reporting seems like an overwhelming task even though it is just one short post at a time. part of the trouble is a generalized lack of focus i am struggling with this week even though i have mountains of work to do.

i have noticed that lots of folks have checked out the bella coola photo gallery from my trip online since i posted the link to it monday. i will be cycling some of my favourites from that trip through here in the next little while and of course taking my camera out on all upcoming excursions (though i’m sure union convention pictures won’t make it on to this site – too ugly! too boring!)

the trip to bella coola went without mishap and turned out to be an excellent 8-day jaunt around the province. the first night we drove as far as 100-mile house (and got caught in a crazy rainstorm the forced us to seek beer and shelter), the second day we got to bella coola and then spent the next 5 days there before returning home via ferry – bella coola – ocean falls – shearwater – bella bella – port hardy, drove to comox and then ferried from there to powell river and then to the sechelt peninsula and drove back to my place. that’s a lot of ferries!

highlights of the trip included hanging out with dayna, ernie and silas – hiking burnt bridge trail in tweedsmuir park and a visit to an ancient cedar grove that boasted some of the biggest trees i’ve ever seen. megan and i made good travelling companions – which was nice to find out as we have never done a roadtrip adventure like this together before. as well as hanging out with some old friends, we met new people as well and were invited places for dinner and evening fires which was as good a way to while away the time as any. basically it was 5 days for playing the guitar, visiting and going for good long walks…. as well as 4 interesting travel days where i got to see many diverse parts of the province i have never known before.

i’ve got more holidays planned for the first week in september after the long weekend, and just yesterday booked a canoe for a 5-day trip with aaron in the sechelt inlet. i also booked dive lessons for myself in october. i’ve gotten more and more into ocean-recreation lately, which has a lot to do with where i am living (the hiking trails are only so-so but the kayak routes are amazing and really accessible). i have a goal of buying a kayak in the next year or so, depending on how much the one i decide on costs. in the meantime, people have offered me to borrow theirs and there are lots of affordable rentals close by – it’s not like boats are hard to come by on the sunshine coast.

as far as everything else goes, i’ve got a grievance hearing today and a union-management meeting tomorrow and a harassment-investigation meeting on friday! plus there’s been some really intense weirdness associated with one of the lists i moderate…. i’m feeling a bit “processed-out” at the moment – but at least it keeps life interesting.

yes, i am back in town and at work today. i got back to the sunshine coast on saturday night after 8 days of travel with stops in 100 mile house, bella coola, ocean falls, shearwater, bella bella (these were all stops on the ferry between bella coola and port hardy), and powell river.

i am not quite up to writing a post about the trip yet (though it was excellent and lots of fun and the bella coola valley is amazing) – but i have managed to post some pictures which can be viewed at my gallery bella coola sojourn on the red cedar photo page.

woo hoo!

i just finished drafting a briefing note i’ve been struggling with all week!

and i might get to go to prince rupert at the end of august for work! (yeah – rupert – i’ve got people i want to see up there).

and i leave for holidays tomorrow afternoon!

i had a dream last night that i was raped – grabbed by someone i knew who came from a dark corner of a room and taken even though i struggled. the intercourse ended only because two other men entered the room as daylight broke, and the man who was forcing me was shamed by them to stop.

the reason the man told them he had forced me was because i was walking through the room with no clothes on – and that made him believe i wanted sex with him, even though i didn’t realize he was there. in any case, i must have been asking for it to be walking through this room naked (i was sleepwalking in the dream… go figure).

and so i left the room, ashamed, and also blaming myself for what had happened. obviously it was my fault because i had flaunted myself (unintentionally) and thus caused this action to take place. i was very angry with myself for being so stupid as to have fallen asleep in this room in the first place, for if i had not gone to sleep there, i would not be sleepwalking there and thus a target for this man…

the dream went on from there, i went out in the world and told people i encountered my story – friends at a coffee shop, someone i met on the road. the more times i told my story, the more i became convinced i had been wronged and the rape was not my fault. other people didn’t tell me that, but i came to believe it upon reviewing my actions over and over again. i became so sure of myself that i decided to go back and confront the person who had done this action to me.

he defended himself, and told me the same story about how it was my fault and he thought that was what i wanted. he cried, and told me he felt badly for what had happened, but continued to make the action my responsibility. in the end, he became angry, and told me terrible things about myself.

the best part about the dream, is that i didn’t believe him.