Red Cedar

This morning, some of my friends over at Tribe have posted their reflections on a Samhain ritual they attended last night – which touched me in a particular way, only because I’ve been thinking about my own need for some ritual in my life in relation to the quickly approaching December 7th anniversary (followed shortly afterwards by the 2nd anniversary of Bob Everton’s death which is December 17th… wow – what a month).

For those of you who have joined this blog late in the game – one year ago, December 7th, the lives of many US and Canadian activists were ripped apart by the FBI in a wave of arrests now known as the “Green Scare”. Several of those people were/are friends of mine, and the past year of supporting Darren has been a ride of emotional intensity unmatched at any other point in my life. I have learned an incredible amount about myself and others in that time – had many doubts about the movement reinforced – and now mostly feel that I am moving into a better place as a result. (that is – most days I feel that, there are still days of wondering whether I will ever get to leave this behind….)

In any event – I have been feeling very strongly that I don’t want to spend December 7th alone, but I’m not sure exactly what to do with that impulse. It doesn’t feel like the right time to do ritual because so much of the situation is left hanging… But I would like to have some kindof gathering – even just in an east-end bar where people who are in some way connected to this situation could get together for a pint or two. Perhaps this is a bad idea? I’m wondering if any of you local people out there have an opinion about this…. Or does someone want to offer up their home? Or are there other ideas?

I know if I don’t plan something, I’ll end up alone on December 7th – and I’m sure that’s not a place I want to be with this.

After a weekend of union meetings, I slept too long last night and am sluggish and a bit grumpy today. Despite that I’ve started packing the downstairs of my house up.. hoping the motions towards moving will create the karma I need to get a place!

The house I looked at on Charles Street last weekend is looking like a definite possibility, but apparently the owner is having trouble getting in touch with my references! The apartment building I last lived in no longer is managed by the same company and my employer wasn’t getting back in a timely manner (but apparently just did). I’m keeping my fingers crossed though – it’s not perfect, but I really hate looking for places to live – and dammit! i’m a good tenant.

Anyhow – if I do get that place, I won’t be moving until mid-December which gives me lots of time to pack boxes and curse at the amount of stuff I own. I have already managed to throw away a bag of garbage today in the packing process – and filled a couple boxes with sally ann donations. It’s shameful this accumulation.