Red Cedar
More apocalypse, less angst
Here I am.
Thirty-six years old today and sitting in a hotel room in Ottawa. Something I’ve done a lot in the last couple of years; this hotel room, this city, this life of back and forth. But this time is a little different because it’s not part of a continuum of every month going back and forth. This trip is for a union role that will last for this week and then I will come home for awhile. BC for the next few months at least. And hopefully will be selling and buying and moving in with Brian in that time before the next round of travel starts anew (for it will, though I’m not sure for what purpose yet).
I have no idea what this year of my life is supposed to be about yet, two major projects in my life are closing off in the next few weeks – work and union projects that had defined timelines and are coming to their natural (and blessed) end, and I’m not sure what will open up beyond. Though I am pretty positive I’ve got lots on the horizon and it’s nice (for the first time in a long while) to be unsure about what those things might be.
What I do know at this moment of writing is that I’ve got a good job with lots of potential directions, a future in my union of some sort, and a loving partner who supports me with his whole heart and being. I’ve got good friends and a relatively intact family, a decent place to live, and enough in my pocket to give support to those in my life in times of need. And besides all of that I’ve got books and writing and music and nature enough to fill my mind and soul for the forseeable years to come.
Which could all change in a blink. I realize. But for what I have and don’t have now I am grateful and secure that this year will be interesting at least, and most likely very productive. Not to mention loving, and fun, and weird, and all those things that keep me intrigued and happy. It’s bedtime here and I am alone, but happy in the knowledge that there are wonderful people and things to return home to at week’s end.
One Comment on “Here I am.”
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Red Cedar 
it sounds like your birthday reflections were positive.
for my birthday anna allowed me to assist with cai; it’s easy to be happy when there is a laughing child underfoot.
hopefully it helps her be a better mom (or at least a more relaxed one).