Musical therapy.

So yeah. I couldn’t sleep after I got home last night which means I’m working at home today. I actually intended to take a sick day, but since 9 I’ve been working through my email – so I don’t feel so guilty about not going in.

I’m having a listen-through-my-music-collection kinda day, since I’ve got all sorts of stuff in my iTunes that I pretty much never think of, plus I just downloaded some new music recently that I haven’t listened to yet. This is just the stuff *on* my computer, I have tons more on a separate hard drive which gets switched on and off the machine according to my whim of the moment. In cleaning up my collection a bit today, I had a realization that even though I’ve got a ton of indie rock, electronica and other stuff on the machine, at heart I’m really a sucker for string quartets – strings in general – but quartets in particular. Something about the balance of forces always sits in the right place center of chest for me. So really it’s turned out to be a Kronos Quartet and Cracow Klezmer Orchestra day. (Apparently the Cracow is now known as the Bester Quartet).

Really, it’s making me pine to play music again. I’m going to have to resolve that I think even though I’m already very busy – there has to be a way to fit something in that is fun and expressive again.

I think my trauma-response has come down somewhat aided by both my visit to the naturopath and a brief visit from the boy last night before I went out (no really – sex helps me destress…. it was a good thing). I was approached at work yesterday about being interested in managing part of this national project which would mean some pretty significant responsibility and role shifts for me…. and I have been getting no end of kudos recently both as a union rep and as a worker – which is helpful as well. As long as I can keep it all together and find ways to take care of myself despite the heavy working conditions….. More exercise, more beet juice, more stretching and breathing. I know. But it’s always good to hear people’s suggestions.

I am attempting to force myself into things such as going out dancing (ack! I know!) and to shows since I seem to be getting invited all over the place. Mad Professor on Friday night at the Commodore with Jeremy… something I would normally say no to all of a sudden seems like a good idea. Really. I need to work on being a human who doesn’t hate being in a crowded room with other humans.

Oh – and tomorrow night (Thursday) – Anne Feeney is playing at RIME on the Drive. She’s a great labour/folk singer type and the Flying Folk used to play with her lots (plus she covers one of our songs). I’ll be heading over there soon as I’m done my early evening meeting….. I figure I might as well have as much good social time as possible before leaving for Ottawa again next Wednesday (gone for 6 days again).