All or nothing.

Perhaps this is just my rollercoaster, but I will never understand how one random day can feel like the end of the world, while the very next doesn’t seem so bad. Converging horomones, sugar levels, bouts of insomnia and a dose of everpresent self-doubt – and I want to give it all up, quit everyone I know and disappear. Dramatic eh? It’s an all or nothing precipice I face – no way out but to jump.

Silly, then, I feel silly when I come down the next day from my ledge, realizing that really it’s not so bad after all – and a couple days of sleeping in are probably the cure-all I need right now.

This doesn’t mean that what I posted yesterday is not true. I am looking for work in Victoria and have been for a month or so – I am considering coming back to the city in the interim and renting out my house – but I don’t feel nearly so desparate about any of it today. Phew! That 48-hours is over!

In better news, Darren is being transferred today and hopefully we’ll be able to talk again soon – and I finished a draft report on my trip to Colombia for my union which I will post here once I finalize it. I’m quite happy with it, but it needs some final editing. I would like to write a shorter article on the links between privatization and the paramilitary organizations for one of the local weeklies or online publications – but haven’t got started on that yet.

So glad the dark days have passed again.